Wednesday, 24 April 2013

Place Beyond The Pies


Crap on a spatula –to quote Noel Coward, it’s been a veritable arse of a week…however, as Big Dave, my Slovenian fans and Ethel Merman know - the show must go on!

I had the good fortune to go to an actual, honest-to-God cinema last week to see Derek "Dezzie" Cianfrance (great name!)’s latest offering “The Place Beyond the Pines” featuring two of the biggest sets of muscles (both acting and physical) in Hollywood: Msrs. Bradley Cooper, aka “the Coops” and Ryan Gosling aka “Gossers” (his fans will be known henceforth as “Gosser’s Tossers” – no judgement, I think he’s tremendous)

Now, Gosser’s Tossers will be a little disappointed as Gossers himself only appears in this film for about 20 minutes of this, what seemed like, seven hour epic. Cianfrance brings us a modern father/son drama, worthy of 19th century literature, minus the servants and tea. Brief summary: Gossers is a ne’er be good motorcross circus stuntman who, unbeknown to him, has knocked up another local bicycle, Eva Mendes, during his past season at the “Carnie”. On discovering the fruit of his loins, he decides to turn his life around and make some money to provide for his son. Due to his poor CV and lack of unpaid work experience (I feel his pain) he decides to gain some sure fire cash by robbing banks. 



Despite this excellent career move, it backfires when he forgets his sunglasses and downsizes to a cheaper bike which does not provide the right speed of getaway that he has formerly been accustomed to. He gets busted by the Coops who shoots him in the head by a mistake. Blood everywhere, beep sound on the monitor, curtains closed. Shucks mate. 



The Coops is also shot in the thigh but, you know, gets over it in the way that only the Coops can - through masculine good looks and tortured facial expressions. Once the viewer has recovered from his physical beauty, we learn that the Coops has a son who is the same age as Gossers, thus setting the scene for cracking rivalry which will take place when these two sons find themselves at the same high school 16 years down the line. There will be drugs, more police stations, corruption, family tragedy, divorce, guns, football jerseys and even a hint of political office – who could ask for anything more?



Was that the worst film plot summary ever? Well…check out some of the corkers on imdb.com and then let me know.

Jokes aside, the cinematography is magnificent. One really feels the line between this film and Cianfrance’s last offering ‘Blue Valentine’. The performances are brilliant and surprising, particularly that of Bradley Cooper who perfectly captures the notion of a man who is isolated from his family through his own guilt and convictions about a fair and just society which evidently does not exist in the often corrupt surrounds of the police force. The minor characters are brilliant as Cianfrance creates a rich tapestry to accompany the arrestingly beautiful scenes of the wilderness of Upstate New York. The weak link is Eva Mendes – no surprise there. Looking forward to Cianfrance’s next offering of banging modern day Americana.

Orange Wednesday permitting, I will manage to see Michael Winterbottom (great name)’s ‘The Look of Love’ or even catch some of London’s Sundance Film Festival which starts today (if I’m not mistaken) What will you guys be seeing?

Until next time…

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